Thursday, November 29, 2012

Cartoon - THE NEW TRIO

I'm a 'natural', and I'm FULL of brilliant ideas on justabout anything. If you need inspiration, or things to think about, just drop me a line or give me a call and I guarantee I'll overwhelm you with an epic tide of stimuli. Back a bit, DC Comics was looking for new 'superhero' concepts and immediately submitted this. It was no trouble, no trouble at all -- I could do superhero concept creation all day 24/7. I have not heard back from DC and I expected they would be ready to get going -- so to nudge them in the right direction -- here is my latest 'crime busting trio' because I wanted it to be a duo, but then 'Joe Horizontal' showed up with his poetry and had to be included. Enjoy! CM Evans Cartoons

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Cartoon - Rabbit Trick

Hey, I'm feeling good today and I've been drawing a lot of new cartoons. There's a UK publication that wants magic cartoons, and here is one that I pulled together today. I don't work with color all the time, my cartoon figure is hard to color -- I can't figure out the tone of his skin. I like his turtleneck and green pants. Who is that guy, anyways? His name is "Hup". Hup and I have been pals for about 25 years. I started drawing him when I was procrastinating in my geometry class, in high-school. Santa Rosa Senior High. CM Evans Cartoons

Cartoon - New Laptop

I guess this is gonna happen next, sooner or later, so I might as well get used to the idea. Plus, the laptop will be easier to keep clean, right? No slots, input ports, or do-dads to trap dust or crap, or add ons, or unapproved software someone would want, that used to ruin your computing experience. CM Evans Cartoons

Cartoon - Hardware Store

I did know that fleas cannot drown. I found out yesterday that the head louse can hold its breath underwater. Don't ask me how I found out. One method of getting rid of a lice infestation, is to seal things that cannot be washed in a plastic bag for 4 months. I hear also that olive oil, tea tree oil, and napalm get rid of lice. Lice also don't like living on Mars, asteroids,or the moons of Jupiter.  CM Evans Cartoons

Monday, November 26, 2012

Cartoon - Nina Pinta Hagia Sophia

Let me here update history. I was going to do some kind of cartoon about Columbus and Christmas, but them's the breaks. CM Evans Cartoons

Cartoon - Oh Tannenbaum

Ya know, we really have not gotten started with the Holidays here, and a bunch of weird stuff has already gone down. I know it is going to be a strange Holiday Season. I mean, I give up trying to make it normal, it apparently isn't physically possible. When I told a pal about this, he said, "Yeah man! That is a great idea! Why can't Christmas trees be more like that! Then Christmas would rock!"

All said an done, I'm going to give food away as gifts this year. I'm tired of trying to find the perfect gift for each person, unless they want a Christmas Tree. CM Evans Cartoons

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Cartoon - And Before Spears...

I'm watching a show about warfare in ancient Egypt. Poop has always been one of the ultimate weapons. The show hasn't talked about poop yet. CM Evans Cartoons

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Have a Happy Thanksgiving

I wish all of you who celebrate Thanksgiving, that you have a happy one. If you can celebrate, you should. I am going up to Napa, in Northern California, to see my family. We'll have a good time. For the rest of the world who does not know about the American custom of Thanksgiving, this is when we celebrate our National Victory over the Martian Expeditionary Force, at the Battle of Crispy Hump -- where the Federal Army ended the Mars invasion of the mid 1880s, right after the conclusion of the American Civil War. CM Evans Cartoons

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Cartoon - Blog Popular

I think this famous quote sums it up:

"Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum."

                                                      --- Anonymous

CM Evans Cartoons


Do me a favor: If you have any buddies in Africa, tell them about me and my cartoon blog. The whole of Africa is ignoring me. 

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Cartoon - Cloud Erase

Hello there. I have a huge server farm that I outsourced to Romania, or China. I really don't know where it is, and I want you to upload all your information -- financial and personal, to my Cloud service.

You'll sign a NDA that allows me unfettered access to all of your life revealed in that data, to use any information about you to sell you things, and report you to law enforcement when I scrub your data with elegant algorithms, to see what you might purchase, and what bad things you might be inclined to do.

My service is special that way -- not only do I identify you to advertisers, I also anticipate if you will do criminal things in the future based off your patterns in the data. It is free until you need your information back, or you realize your privacy had been hopelessly computerized into a digital guinea pig I can do experiments on. CM Evans Cartoons

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Cartoon - 35000 Toothbrush

This is a first for all of us -- I don't think I've ever cartooned about a toothbrush. I was watching a documentary last night about a cave in France that has drawings in it that are over 35,000 years old. I made it about half way through the film, because there were way too many scenes of scientists quivering with joy as they walked on metal platforms in the dark, backlit by electric headlamps. They found calcite covered skulls, bones, heaps of ancient trash, and I am sure the bark sports-page will also turn up. Bark lasts a long time, if you seal it in a cave.  CM Evans Cartoons

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Cartoon - Evil Leader Hut

Gosh, quite a sale here, can you believe it? They hardly EVER have a 50% sale at ELH. I picked up a pair of chrome skull cufflinks that fire poison darts, a hydra shaped tie-pin with ruby eyes, and the ever popular Jugular Slicing Expando Pants, in buff and charcoal grey. I was holding out for the 'bullet returning' navy blue blazer, but they only had it in XXL and XXXL. Oh well, they'll always be a place I want to shop for those hard to satisfy giftees. CM Evans Cartoons

Friday, November 09, 2012

Cartoon - Contortional Alphabet

Thing I like about this cartoon -- the background reminds me of a gym or a 'recreational center'. I wasn't thinking of a scene set in a gym or recreational center -- but after I drew the unfortunate contorter, I drew in a few extra cartoon people in the air over my signature. I was going to do some cutting and pasting to move things around, but I liked the feeling of space & observers, so I added another cartoon person on the left and then a wall up there with a door, far away.  CM Evans Cartoons

Cartoon - New Artisanal Mayonnaise

I wanna write something about this cartoon and my new artisanal mayonnaise, but it didn't work out so good, so I'm crying uncontrollably. Back to making my own custom iron-oxide inks and ginger-beers. CM Evans Cartoons

Monday, November 05, 2012

Cartoon - Thrust Lumber

I'm happy we're one day away from the end of the election cycle, determining who will be the President of the United States of America, or the Honorable New American Sisyphus. Then I can get serious and stop making Yoga cartoons.

I was hoping that other candidates would be on the ballot. My ideal ticket would be Tony Bennett as Executive-in-Chief, with Susan Sarandon as vice-President for the PACC party. That is the Peaches And Cream Coalition, an entirely fictitious political organization of my own fertile imagination. They would obviously be 'pro' fruit and dairy products.

If Tony or Susan wouldn't run, I'd settle for a Gene Simmons and Richard Simmons ticket -- please, we need to think of solutions that would do much good for the country. Other than that, I have no ideas. CM Evans Cartoons

Friday, November 02, 2012

Cartoons - Happy and Sushi

Did you all survive Trick-or-Treating? My apologies to our international visitors, I realize that most of the world does not hold to Halloween.

I had no costume when I took the kids out to Laguna Beach for the festivities on Oak Street -- the residents there shut several blocks down, and they decorate their houses into Halloween extravaganzas. My children SAID I was supposed to create for my left hand a 'Claw-Like Appendage, Dripping in Blood' -- they said it did not have to be made of metal --  I could make it out of cardboard if I wanted to. Unfortunately, I was busy with work, so I did not show up with a claw, and I caught hell for it. Luckily, there was a spare wicker basket and a extra coat, so I quickly transformed into 'Basket-Head Coat-Hair' and this passed as an alternate disguise, due to the sheer insanity of it.

In fact, some drunk people who saw me as 'Basket-Head Coat-Hair' wished they had decided to be something along these lines. CM Evans Cartoons