If You Read Only 5 Books in 2019 ...

Scoot: Whaaat? ... (typing) ... That'll do, pig.

More Scientific Results

I Live in a Harbinger Household Which Means Everything We Do is Basically Crap

“Just give him some wood, and he’ll build you a cabinet.” — Mike D https://twitter.com/Acanthotelson

I'm All Set to Throw Myself Under the Bus

Fact of the day: The Tiger-Lilly (Cepoliocillios Momentous Granguili) is actually a tessiopod, rather than a fruit bearing flower. 

Well if it isn't irrelevant ...

Scoot: I can't believe all the management style crap I have to do today.

Pops: Uh huh.

In My Workout I am Dragging a Ham

Scoot: No iron core! Pops!
Pops: He's in full-blown panic mode.
Dabs: I don't remember it working that way.
Scoot: Weird gain issues?
Eels: That could have been what was happening to me. It was insulting me personally. I swear.
Pops: Could have been?
Scott: (To Eels) Not unless your name is 'weird gain issues'!
Eels: Ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

Coffee is Not Made Out of Coffee

TUESDAY 10:46 AM

Dane: (Speaking rapidly) It was the same, it was the large one. It was... two.
Scoot: Oh my GOD! He replied, "It wasn't the hundred foot one, it was the one with the lumps."

LATER

Scoot: It is the same audio one?
Merk: They say they always had one.
Scoot: That sounds optiplexy to me. And .. uh. Hallway. Jeb.
Stella: Sure, what. I'm not going to be sleeping on a plane.
Scoot: I heard you were very good at your job, sober.
Stella: ???